J’aramel Edwards, accredited Houston area G (allegedly), was arraigned yesterday in Harris County Criminal Court for his arrest last month in Greenspoint. The defendant has been charged with two counts of fronting after explicitly stating, “I ain’t frontin’, yo,” in the presence of several eye witnesses while the alleged fronting occurred.
Proceedings began with the prosecution’s recounting of Edwards allegedly fronting his G-status in a public domain. Defense attorney Mike Lowell vehemently denied the fronting charges and avowed that Edwards was, indeed, 100% trill.
Shortly after, witness Luv’ly Piatkowski gave her account of the incident, telling the courtroom Edwards is innocent, and to her knowledge, has never fronted. She solidified her statement by insisting this was “Real G shit” seven times, and making gun shot sounds. The prosecution’s subsequent prodding into her decidedly Polish last name was objected to by the defense and sustained by Judge Long, but succeeded in weakening the girl’s credibility as a witness as the only association the majority of the jury had with Poland was Polish jokes handed down from generation to generation.
The prosecution then went on to paint Edwards as a man prone to fronting, going so far as to label him “fugazi,” attack his street cred with rumors of a failed G-check in the city’s Third Ward several months past, and, most damaging of all, claimed he “…ain’t about that life.” They argued that while Edwards has boasted about carrying ratchets with bodies on them, they were unable to locate any of the aforementioned dirty weapons.
Edwards took the stand and under cross examination told Judge Long, and members of the jury, in an even tone, “Your honor, I can assure you that on the night in question I was in no way, shape or form fronting.”
The prosecution practically exploded at the conclusion of Edwards’ statement. “Your honor,” screamed the prosecution, “this is absurd! Listen to that statement! It’s crystal clear he was fronting. Or he’s fronting now. Or he fronted then, and now!”
Edwards then interrupted. “No, no! I ain’t gon’ front,” said Edwards, “I was in the Third Ward, but there wan’ no G-check, bruh bruh—for real.”
“Your honor,” said the prosecution, “this man is a serial fronter!”
The prosecution’s accusation ignited a five-minute melee. Judge Long was forced to adjourn the courtroom and reschedule the proceedings.
Trial is scheduled to resume today at 10 a.m.