Dear Editor,
I do not want to take up too much of your time, so I will be brief. I recently heard that the geniuses in Hollywood are turning the old television series, The A-Team, into a full length feature film. To this I say, “WTF?” I’m not sure what ‘WTF?’ means, but I’ve heard the kids say it, and I’m pretty sure I’ve used it in the correct context here. Anyway, I don’t understand why Hollywood continues to take bad television series and turn them into even worse films (see The Dukes of Hazzard, cool Dodge Charger notwithstanding, as a prime example).
As a fan of the movies, I’d like to see more original material coming out of the studios. I think the only way this can happen though, is for Hollywood to run out of shows to repackage as movies. With this in mind, I’d like to help out. Let’s just get it over with. I’m sure that executives and producers have some hot-shot assistants who do this sort of thing for them, but perhaps they are too young to remember some of the atrocities that have been brought into our living rooms over the years. I’ve taken the time to prepare a list of terrible shows Hollywood can make into movies, so that we can all move on. No need to thank me. Oh, just add ‘The Movie’ to the end of each title.
She’s the Sheriff
Carter Country
Amen
My Two Dads
Hello, Larry
The Ropers
Mama’s Family
Mr. Belvedere
Joanie Loves Chachi
B.J. and the Bear
After MASH
Sincerely,
Olin Sacchi
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