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May 24th
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Texas Cockroach OfficesThe contents of this material are © Copyright 2009 by TexasCockroach.com LLC and may not be reprinted or re-transmitted in whole or in part without the express written consent of the publisher. The Texas Cockroach is not intended for readers under 13 years of age. The Texas Cockroach uses invented names in all its stories, except in cases where public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental.

The events depicted on this Web site are fictitious. Any similarity to any person living or dead is merely coincidental. The reason they are coincidental is we were born and raised in Texas. We grew up in a small Texas town, graduated from Texas universities, moved to the largest city in Texas to seek our fortunes, blew those fortunes due to general laziness, and ended up back in small Texas towns. We’ve lived in places like Georgetown, Austin, Lubbock, Katy, Pflugerville, League City, Houston, Shelby, Mason and Brenham, so don’t confuse us with some Yankee intellectuals making fun of the Lone Star State; although no one has ever actually called us intellectuals, we’re hopeful. We love Texas and hope you’ll laugh with us – not at us. Although when push comes to shove, we’ll take “at us,” too.

If you have plans to sue and/or shoot us, we hope you will develop a sense of humor and as strong of a belief in the 1st Amendment as you likely have in the 2nd Amendment. The entire contents of this publication are satire and not to be taken seriously. If you sue us, you will likely end up being satirized in front of a much larger audience on The Daily Show, CNN, MSNBC or The Onion. Then, of course, we’ll further satirize that fact because we do hold a grudge. However, if you still decide to sue us, there’s probably a hippy, Yankee, ACLU lawyer that will take our case and make your life miserable, so let’s not even drive down that country road.

God Bless Texas!

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